The helmsman

Father and mother as parents, find mention in the Bible which instructs children to honour them and to be obedient to them in the Lord. Father’s Day is observed on the third Sunday of June every year while Mother’s Day is observed on the second Sunday of the preceding month of May every year. A mother is the first teacher of the child in kindergarten and the father is the second teacher from primary level. Both parents build foundations of the child’s character and personality. The foundation formed through biblical teachings also promote ethical values. In Ephesians 6:1-3 Paul instructed : “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right; that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the earth.” Exodus 20:12 is also explicit when it says : “Honor your father and mother, so that your days may be long in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.” The Bible places much value on obedience and honour to the father and mother. This in a significant way is reflected in breakdown of family values in contemporary society which has contributed much to negation of social peace and harmony. Bad parenting is the result of making too many compromises with discipline, obedience and honour. Although a lot may have changed over the concept of fatherly responsibility; yet it still does not change the role of a father nor absolves him from his family responsibility. Today psychologists have come to agree that fathers play a unique and crucial role in nurturing and guiding children’s development. Often the biblical teaching on the father as the head of the wife has been misinterpreted to mean male dominance. This is not the truth; for the Bible clearly says that a husband must love his wife as he loves himself. They are equal partners in the God ordained marriage. According to the Bible, Eli was guilty of fathering errors. As high priest he was a model but failed to impact godly values in his sons. He was a very busy man and could not train up his sons in the right way. By avoiding instead of confronting, Eli failed to correct his children. The tragedy of this story is that Eli knew what a godly father should have done, but he didn’t. When God ordained the family, He had in mind a vibrant and healthy family that contributes to a peaceful environment. The roles of a father and mother are not independent but inter-dependent-for they are one. The important thing to remember is that mothers and fathers often bring different strengths and styles to their parenting roles. These roles complement each other, meaning that they are not interchangeable and are each necessary for healthy childrearing. In a world where truth has become relative and where wealth is esteemed more than integrity family values are being consistently weakened. As their children grow, fathers take on added roles of guiding their children’s intellectual and social development. On father’s day, may the fathers introspect on the times and of their own situation on the material and spiritual level, and finally, an estimation of the good of the family, of society and of the Church.